I dreamt that I had a moustache. Not that strange, because I think about them a lot for some reason. But this moustache totally sucked. it was long and straggly and totally black so you could see how much of it there WASN’T. The entire dream was spent with my hand over my mouth trying to ask where I could find a waxing shop.

Then I looked up and into a mirror and my face was that of a man who is a friend of mine. Not me at all, and this man can grow a proper ’stash too, doubly confusing.